When the day met the night..

Salam n good day!

Hmm, lately I have come across so many ‘heart’ problems..masalah hati dan perasaan.haha..lucu banget..

It’s not the problem that is funny..but I tend to shook my head when I think back..when I think back about myself. I was [an am] stupid..

If people ask me about my love life, I revealed it easily. There is nothing to hide. And it belongs to the past. So I have moved over. Have got over it..

When I think back, being frenz has always made me feel better..you confide in frenz..you feel better..but you hardly confide in your lover..coz sometime you just want to appear to be the best..to be strong on the surface..even thou not all the way through..but in frenz?S/he is the place for you to pour your worry..their silence means s/he is thinking. S/he might not offer help..but to have someone who you can trust is already enuff…isn’t it?

When you love  your frenz, you would prefer to show your true colour..the real you ..becoz you feel happy the way you are, that’s why. And tht’s why you feel happy…bcoz you don’t have to pretend..you can be the real you.

But can you do the same to your lover?I don’t know. I have always felt the absence of frenship in relationship..and I don’t like it. I feel miserable bcoz you cannot really become yourself.

And the worse part of all relationship is when you start as frenz and gradually become lovers..Haha. Yea, that kind of relationship ALWAYS sounds promising. I like it as well..but I have never liked the consequences if we broke up…you would NEVER get the old, happy times anymore…every meeting seems weird and strange.and you feel like running away..to avoid it at all cost..that is the consequences that  I am afraid the most..to not being able to have him anymore..to lose him, I mean her old him forever. Even thinking about this situation makes me feel hollow and bleak. Bleak. It hurts when you lose frenz that you cherish most.

People see me laugh, have they ever see through me? Yea, I have never give it a chance. I have always pretend to be strong. And that teach me to be strong..my ex used to complaint..’You don’t have to pretend to be strong all the time!’.Haha..and yea, he is right..but somehow, I prefer it to be this way..I cannot afford to confide in people more than I should..because, if I do, they will see me cry. And my strength makes me trustworthy..because they always see me in perfect way..in a way that I am a kind who is invulnerable..who is less-human,because I don’t seem to care about anything, I don’t seem to be hurt merely by words, I seem to have…no emotion.

Am I?

Well, The Lion, will always be The Lion, he cannot afford to let the lioness to lose faith in him!^_^